33 lines
3.3 KiB
Plaintext
33 lines
3.3 KiB
Plaintext
isn't it the ultimate sign of a movie's cinematic ineptitude when you can't think of much to say about it other than " it sucks " ?
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one of the first official year 2000 releases , supernova is such a movie .
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i can't seem to get past one-word adjectives with this one , although " boring , " " stupid " and " absurd " doesn't amount to much of a review .
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a shame .
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i would have been able to save myself the chore of desperately trying to elaborate .
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but c'est la vie .
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here goes nothing .
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i'll keep it short .
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i suppose the first bad omen for supernova came when director walter hill ( 48 hours ) removed his name from the movie , requesting that it be replaced with the pseudonym thomas lee .
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the film's fate was sealed in many minds when struggling studio mgm declined to screen it for the press , an event usually signifying a studio's lack of confidence in a particular movie .
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hill's and mgm's actions were prudent .
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when the captain of medical space vessel nightingale dies in a tragic hyperjump accident , a reformed drug addict who is also the first officer , for some reason ( james spader ) is forced to take command .
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the ship picks up a distress call from a nearby planet and , on arrival , picks up one survivor from an apparent accident in an abandoned mining colony .
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one of the crew members ( angela bassett ) knows this passenger , who is played by peter facinelli , and has some bad feelings about it -- and we all know what that means .
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this intergalactic hitchhiker is carrying some mysterious cargo -- a jellylike substance the purpose of which is unknown , though it seems to bring some form of pleasure to whoever touches it .
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another one of the crew members experiences this first hand ; after spending a few minutes partially inside this glob of goo , he does some impressive handstand pushups .
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evidently , touching this enigmatic egg-shaped thingie makes you younger and stronger .
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how ?
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why ?
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the movie never bothers to explain .
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soon enough though , spader and bassett are running around the ship like mad , being chased by the all-of-a-sudden-superhuman facinelli .
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to be honest , i don't even remember exactly why .
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i just remember that i didn't care .
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supernova's plot suggested some more or less interesting ideas , such as the ball of goo being an intergalactic time bomb , but they are all dropped before they have a chance to develop into anything truly intriguing .
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in fact , everything is dropped just so the actors can have some fun running around what looks like an elaborate set .
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well , the effects are good , though there's hardly a studio movie with bad special effects these days so i'm not sure whether that's so remarkable an accomplishment .
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the performances are hardly worth talking about .
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i'm not even sure i can call what's here " performances , " though angela bassett sure is good at giving people the finger .
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james spader is not a bad actor , but he proves to be one of the blandest action stars i've seen in a while , mostly because he isn't given a character with a personality .
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the action scenes are just as bland , since they're pretty much just rehashes of action elements that weren't particularly entertaining the first time around .
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and since the action scenes are everything to this movie , it's pretty much dead in the water .
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and for the life of me , i can't figure out why it's called supernova .
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